The Creepy Stuff

So I didn't get to either GS or the Horror Novel last night. Ya know, I don't know if "Horror Novel" is a good term for it. It's more of a contemporary fantasy with some scary crap thrown in for fun. In any event, it's a rough one to write. There are a lot of echoes of my own (not always pleasant) childhood in it and it rakes me over the coals each time I touch it. I can only hope it's worth the depression that ensues after each session at the screen. Actually, I think it's my best work (which ain't saying much; seeing as I've got no novels published yet!) To be fair though, I've never submitted any of my novels and I do have one professional short story sale, along with one pending, so maybe I'm not as bad as I fear. (Here's hopin'!) Anyway, the Horror Story --which is hereafter to be referred to as "Fish"-- (don't ask!) really makes me dig very deep into those dank, nasty, places in my heart that I'd just as soon lock up and lose the key to!

It's about loneliness, abuse, being an outsider and giving up on life (sounds just dreamy, don't it?) all things I have more than a passing aquaintance with. The usual fantasy stuff I do doesn't have quite that level of angst in it. I prefer things that are a bit more heroic. Is that avoidance? Beats the hell out of me. All I know is when I write GS & "Clans" I feel good afterward. I think that I've got good storylines going (though the poor ladies from my Crit Cricle may beg to differ!) and they're pretty well written. Whenever I work on "Fish" I feel like someone just kicked me in the nuts and ran off, dragging the corpse of my dead puppy behind them on a barbed wire leash. (see what I mean? Creepy stuff!) It's the most important thing I've written so far though (to me). There's a lot of things in it that I think are important to talk about. I don't know if it will ever see the light of day (might burst into instant flame if it did!) but I know that I need to finish it for myself anyway. Funny thing is, there are some really nasty scenes in it that I have a hard time writing. Not because the words won't come (sadly, they pour out like a waterfall) but because the content itself disturbs me. I worry that folks who know me might think that I am that type of person. Oh well, that's one of the dangers of this job I guess. I can only imagine what his friends and family had to say about Stephen King when he first hit the scene! (Now, of course, he's "brilliant, darling!" but back then he was probably just that creepy little Stevie kid . . .)

See? We've discovered yet another good thing about writing: self directed emotional therapy in the form of psychotic characters! You'll browse away from my blog today with something to think about. And they say there's nothing good on the internet! Sheesh!

Later!