Where I'm At

I'm feeling good today, and not just 'cuz it's Friday (though that sure as hell helps!). I just feel . . . hopeful today. No particular reason that I can fathom, I just woke up this a.m. in a good mood with the feeling that life is moving on the right track. That's a rare and precious gift so I intend to enjoy the sensation for as long as I can. Sadly, the wife is definitely not feeling the same way. She's at home today, curled up in bed under a mountain of blankets, fighting off an absolutely miserable cold. She sounds like a bullfrog when she speaks and currently has a tendency to launch into unexpected fits of coughing that are accompanied by flying bits of spittle and other -nastier- bits of bodily type fluids.

It ain't pretty!

I've been trying to be the good hubby: did the laundry, cooked/cleaned up dinner, took the boy to school, etc. so she can rest. For once she's actually doing the smart thing and sleeping this off. Usually, she tries to be Wonder Woman and keep her crazy schedule and workload when she's sick. I can't seem to convince her that one day of rest will cut five days off the illness. (she does look really hot in the Wonder Woman oufit though, so I shouldn't complain!)

Writing. What to say about writing? I haven't done any in the last week but oddly, that's part of why I'm feeling so good. The break seems to have cleared the cobwebs of my twisted little mind a bit and I feel like I'm recharged and ready for NaNo. (Actually excited to get started with it, masochist that I am!) I've spent a lot of time this week just thinking about writing instead of actually doing it. Now, as a general rule, that's frowned upon but I think in this case it was warranted. I've been spending a lot of time thinking about what I need to do to become published. I'm starting to understand that I've been hiding behind the actual act of writing so that I didn't have to face the business side of this career. My attitude has been: "Oh, I'm too busy working on the next novel to work on getting the finished one published" Stupid, eh? (Einstein, I am not!) Write, and keep writing, is the code of the author but I need to devote time to developing a career too. Right now I have four completed novels sitting in my drawer and I'm about 1/3 of the way into number five (which will hopefully be done after NaNo!). I haven't actively marketed any of them, just sent out half a dozen agent queries with a synopsis of the one I think is most marketable right now. That is never going to get me to where I want to be. I am going to need to set time aside for pushing my career forward. It seems that I've (finally!) conquered the problems I had with writing every day, so now I need to add in "business every day". I need to be more strict on getting edits done, getting queries out to agents and publishers, and generally paying more attention to the market I'm trying to work in. I have to get past the fear of actually dealing with professionals. I still feel like a little kid at his first dance. I know how to dance, and I know I'm supposed to ask one of the girls over against the wall, but they all seem so . . . intimidating! They're all beautiful, smart, and mature, while I'm just a dork with a bad haircut and braces. I have to push past the nervousness if I ever want my chance out on the dance floor. (I'm working up to it! Don't push me, man!) :-)

Along with all that, I've actually had some time to go over "First" in my head. Forcing myself to add in extra description and emotion has been slowing me down. I write action. I do well (I think) with dialog and characters. I need to stop forcing the background details into the first draft and just let it flow. I can add that in during edits. If it doesn't jump from my fingertips onto the page, it will have to wait until the intellectual process of rewrite. For me, the first draft has to be an act of passion. I have to follow the parts of the stories that excite me and let the characters take me to places I didn't even know about. That means a lot more editing at the end of course, but that's what I have to do. As soon as I came to that realization, the stress I've been feeling over my work for the last month or so dropped away. I'm ready to jump back into it with a smile on my face. Now, that may not be the way other folks work, but I think it's right for me. it feels right. PBW has a great post about just that today. She inserts a tag like: [description here] that she fills in during edits. The timing of the post was perfect and I think there are a lot of brackets in my near future!

Oh, I forgot to tell you about the concert the other night!

It was wonderful. Gordon Lightfoot is a calm, quiet, charming guy who came out with four other guys and simply played his music. it was beautiful stuff. Even the boy loved it. It was a very different experience for him and he had a great time. He sat through most of the concert with his eyes closed, head swaying, feet tapping to the beat and just enjoying the sounds. I am a long time fan of Gordon Lightfoot and I was absolutely thrilled when he did "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald". That is probably my favorite song of all time. The music is haunting and the lyrics wonderful. It was great to see him do it live! It's always good when we can expose the boy to new and different things. We spend a lot of time taking him to museums, listening to music (everything from Beethoven to Black Sabbath!) going to fine restaurants, and giving him quality books to read . . . just about anything we can think of to expose him to as much of the wonderful things in life as we can. Of course, we also take time for camping, video games, junk food, and I have a secret love of John Denver and Neil Diamond music (don't tell anyone!) so he gets a pretty eccelectic mix of what the world has to offer.

I think that's a good thing.

Later!