Well, instead of working on "First" today, I used the lunch hour to revise a short story I did a while back and shot it out to a likely looking magazine. (I'll tell you which one if they buy it, otherwise I'll pretend I never put up this post . . . cool, huh?) Nah, I'll tell you whether it's published or no, I just don't wanna jinx things. I went for the short today because I like the story a lot and because I could use a punch in the arm right now. Selling a short might be just what I need to get myself motivated.
Why the lack of motivation? The house of course, what else? Seems like the contractor has bailed on finishing the job and we're likely to end up in court over it. This of course means I will have to finish the house myself, which will chew up all my free time and quite frankly: piss me off to no end! It's frustrating as hell some days, ya' know? Other folks hire contractors regularly and things work out fine. I try ONCE in my life and get hosed in the process.
Dude, I may change my name to "Murphy"!!!!
Enough bitching. Truth is, I don't mind doing the work nearly as much as I say. It can be satisfying to look at it when you're done and know you did it yourself. I've done all the rest of my home by hand, might as well finish it out, right? I'm just hoping the wife and I don't kill each other in the process . . .
She has ways of "helping" (read: pointing out that I've done everything wrong) that make me abso-friggin-lutely nuts. I do much better when she's not around. There is nothing worse than working like an animal all day to get something done then have somebody come waltzing in (clean, nicely dressed, and fresh from a loooovely day with their family!) to tell you that it looks terrible and: how could you not see that? God, you're so lazy! This house would fall down if I weren't around to tell you the right way to do things! Oh, stop whining . . . so you had to do a little work for once! You have to tear it all out, it's not what I want!! And on, and on, and on . . .
Yea, I love her desperately but we DO NOT play nice together.
Funny part is she doesn't even realize she does it. Each time a new job comes up and I ask her to stay away while I do it, she's shocked! She can't conceive of why I don't appreciate that she's helping me. Well, I'm sure she has her own side of that story that she could tell (which no doubt begins with the words: "That asshole husband of mine . . .") but this is my blog darlin' so: PHHHHHTT!!! (go get your own!)
Truth to tell, she's probably right. I am no dream to be around when I'm cranky and doing work I didn't want to do always makes me cranky. Still, any way you cut it: I get more done and with less screaming if I'm left to my own devices. Of course, then I get pissed cuz I'm doing all the work by myself . . .
Yea, she's definitely right.
So, writing will not get any easier in the forseeable future but I'll keep plugging at it. Someday, I'll have an office, and a desk, and maybe an hour or two each day where I can sit down and write. It's a nice dream, anyway.
Later!
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